Tea with Chihiro
by Khaliban
Summary: My take on Keima and Chihiro getting tea after the end of the manga. The first chapter gets a little rough. The second chapter (hopefully) provides closure.
1. Chihiro Has Some Questions

"So, there are loose souls and devils and goddesses, and you were fighting them," Chihiro said. She sipped her tea. She had to admit, Keima's mother made a really good cup of tea.

"I never did any fighting," Keima said. "I found the goddesses and woke them. They did the fighting."

"And they're in love with you."

"They had to be. They get their strength from love."

"And you thought I was one of them."

"I never told you—"

"You didn't need to," Chihiro said. "You wouldn't take a break from saving the world just to get revenge on some girl you barely knew. So, what was it? Why did you say those things?"

Keima sighed. "I had one goddess to find and two candidates. I was trying to conquer two girls at the same time, and it was taking too long. I only had two days. Once I eliminated you as a candidate, I needed to take you off the board."

"How did you eliminate me as a candidate?"

Silence.

"You promised you wouldn't lie or hold back," Chihiro said.

"Candidates had to be a prior conquest," Keima said. "The goddesses allowed the conquests to remember those events. You didn't remember."

"What didn't I remember?"

Keima looked away. "Our kiss."

"I don't remember my first kiss?"

"No."

"Why did you think I remembered?"

Keima sipped his tea. "The girls that remembered would be angry with me after Kanon's declaration. I didn't know that you liked me before the loose soul."

She drank some tea and looked around. "Where were you while I was singing?"

He looked down. "I was on the roof crying."

"Why were you crying?"

"I realized I was in love with you."

She turned away. "Why were you in love with me?"

He sipped his tea again. "I understood that— I realized— You made more—" He sighed. "I don't understand you. And you challenge me." He took a breath. "And you loved me for me."

She watched him for a while. "Tell me about my conquest."

"I never conquered you. You liked me before the loose soul."

"Why did you call it a 'conquest'?"

He looked down. "You weren't the one conquered."

"Tell me about it anyway."

"You were average. You were supposed to be a background character. You were the most unimaginably real girl I ever saw." He watched her, worried he might hurt her again. "You confessed to any cute boy that caught your eye, to make yourself feel special by comparison. You had no flags, no parameters, nothing. I had no idea how to proceed."

Chihiro started to speak but stopped.

"And, you hated me. Acted like you hated me." He laughed. "You called me a cockroach and drove me into my room for days. No one has ever affected me like that."

Chihiro smiled. "I remember calling you a cockroach."

He watched her smile until it faded.

"Ayumi finally got us together," he said. "She didn't like seeing us arguing. I think she was beginning to remember me and didn't want her best friend arguing with a guy she liked. Anyway, I tried to conquer you. As expected, nothing worked. You had no usable parameters. Then, you fixated on someone new. I had an inspiration. I decided to turn you into the hero. I tried to help you conquer your latest crush." He looked away. "I think you agreed to it, because you liked spending time with me. You stalled confessing to Yuta."

"Yuta?" she said. "Oh! Him."

He turned back. "You finally snapped, because I was too dumb to see anything. You ran to the Akanemaru. I thought you were going to kill yourself."

"Over that?" Chihiro said.

"It's what the heroine would do," Keima said. "You complained you weren't special. I said you were. I said you were as special as you wanted to be. I kissed you, and I said I would always be there for you." He turned away. "I lied. I knew you were about to forget everything. I still thought you were average, and I knew I would never need to keep that promise."

"Even a jerk when you saved me," Chihiro said.

"Yes," Keima said. "But, I didn't stop thinking about you. You were the only girl I could never figure out. I said what I thought you wanted to hear. I kissed you when you wanted to be kissed. I played the game by your rules, not mine. I couldn't shake the idea that you beat me, that you forced me to live in the real world." He stared at nothing for a moment. "A few times, I hoped you would need me, so I could keep my promise. But you never did."

"You tutored my band," Chihiro said.

"That doesn't count," he said. "I wanted to rescue you. And kiss you again."

"Wait. How did you know I wanted to be kissed?"

"You were about to hit me with an umbrella," he said. "In retrospect, that logic may be faulty."

"Really?"

"Like that," he said. "You're infuriating sometimes."

"Because I don't let you get away with bullshit?"

"Yes," Keima said. "People need some bullshit to get through the day."

"I'm sorry I'm inconvenient," she said.

"I said 'infuriating'. And it's how you got me to love you."

"Yeah, well," she said. "It's how I fell in love with you too." She glared at him. "Don't look at me like that. I don't know if I'm still in love with you."

"Chihiro—"

"You crushed me the worst way you could, because I was an inconvenience. You hurt me, because I loved you but wasn't special enough!"

She dropped her face into her hands and sobbed. Keima felt a cold, hard stone sink into his gut.

"I guess you weren't good enough to find the goddess without hurting me," she said.

He tried to speak, failed, and tried again. "No. I wasn't. I couldn't read your parameters. I could never understand you. I could never predict you. I knew how to push you away, but I never understood what kept bringing you back. I pushed too hard. I used the worst scenario I could think of. I had to find the goddess. I had to simplify the game." He rubbed tears from his eyes. "It's not supposed to hurt when you drop a character arc. She just stops showing up." He closed his eyes. "Saving the world is supposed to be the excuse for anything. It's not."

"I'm not a game," she said, scowling at him.

"I know."

"No you don't!"

"I'm sorry," he said. "I can't hurt more than this."

"I can!" She shook with pain. "You see story arcs, scenarios and endings. I see my life! You pull out one game and put in another. You finish one girl and move on to the next. But you can't restart me. Everything you've done is still here. And it still hurts."

"You're wrong," he said. "You're not a game to me. You're the most real girl I know. It's why I love you." He sighed. "I can't hurt more than I do. Not ever. I avoid reality, but I know what it is. I hate reality, because you can't restart it. Because real pain never goes away."

"Not never," she said. "But you can't delete it."

"What can I do?"

"Grovel."

"I thought I did."

"No," Chihiro said with a laugh. "You haven't even come close to groveling."

"You're right," Keima said. "I was always good enough to avoid the groveling scenarios."

"Keima, if you call our relationship a scenario one more goddam time..."

"What should I do?"

"Call it a relationship."

"I mean how should I grovel?"

Chihiro said, "Tell me why you need to."

Keima heard, _Show me how much you hurt._

"You beat me." He felt the tears begin but ignored them. "You scared me. You made me fall in love with you. You made reality matter to me. You beat me at my own game. You made me angry. I could have said any number of things to make you leave. I picked the worst, because I wanted to get back at you. I wanted to hurt you for beating me. But, you even beat me at that. Saying all of that left me in agony."

Tears poured down his face, and Chihiro watched him without flinching.

"I was a spoiled child," he said. "I lost at my game and turned over the board. I need to grovel, because I hurt you for no reason and took away your happiness." He took a deep breath. "I want you to be happy. I don't care about anything else. Real pain fades, it doesn't go away. Sometimes, it doesn't fade enough. It's possible to hurt someone so much, you can never recover. I don't know if I hurt you that much. But it doesn't matter. I want you to be happy, even if you're not with me. Tell what you want me to do."

"I figured that out," Chihiro said.

"What?"

"That bullshit you told me on the roof. No one sets up an elaborate revenge like that just because I called him a cockroach."

Keima laughed. "You beat me again! There were days it literally took the end of the world to get me out of bed. And you were over it, because I used clichéd dialogue."

"I wasn't over it," Chihiro said. "It was still a rejection. It still hurt like hell. I thought you were some asshole who couldn't commit and used bullshit from one of your games instead of telling me the truth. I thought I was going to get my first kiss from the boy I loved. Instead, he was just some childish prick."

"So, I went too far," Keima said.

Chihiro sighed. "I would never have helped you with Ayumi if you'd gone that far. I would have tried to save her from you. Besides, I figured out you were in love with me."

"When?"

"I'm not telling you that. Not yet, anyway." She looked away. "I'm amazed you had the guts to tell me yourself."

"Okay," he said, wiping his eyes. "How much groveling?"

"First, you'll spend more time on me than the games."

"That doesn't sound bad."

Chihiro said, "If you try any of those game moves on me, I'll break my guitar over your head."

"They don't work on you."

She thought for a while. "The band might need more tutoring to keep our club."

"That doesn't sound too bad either."

She tilted her head. "My band needs a roadie."

"Anything else?"

"Hell, yes. That's barely enough to cover making me forget my first kiss."

He winced. "How long will this take?"

"Years. If you do a good job."

"And if I don't?"

Chihiro stared at him and waited.

Keima sighed. "Do I need to buy a van?"


	2. Chihiro's Second First Kiss

Chihiro played out their third cover song before the finale and kept time to Yui's hard beat. The girl had a damn metronome in her head. The song was simple pop, but Eri's bass gave it a better edge. And the crowd liked it. Just high school students, and the band didn't get paid, but playing for a crowd was so much more fun than practice.

Chihiro looked over at Keima. He tapped away at his PFP rapidly. He wrote an app to run the band's electronics and track their performance, and he barely looked up from the screen while they were playing. He held up three fingers then raised his thumb. Miyako was behind tempo again. Chihiro turned back to the crowd and finished the song. Her stomach still twisted during the applause.

"Thank you, everyone," she said. More applause. They had fans. Not many, but they were loyal. "Almost done. Who wants to hear '10,000 Tears'?" Always their last song.

"Acoustic!" someone yelled.

Chihiro's heart froze.

More people yelled, "Acoustic!"

Chihiro forced a smile for the crowd. She switched guitars and watched Keima leave the stage. He always left during that song. He said he was getting the van ready. The other girls gave her looks of support. She was glad, but it wasn't the kind of help she needed. She took a breath and started.

"10,000 tears and my heart is still burning,

Your words cutting through me, my stomach is turning,

My life was a game you never wanted to play.

I sing for the crowd, but they don't see my pain.

They cheer at my tears like I'm playing in rain.

But I know I'm not good enough to get you to stay.

10,000 tears won't stop you from lying,

And 10,000 tears won't stop me from dying,

Over and over, just like you wanted me to."

The crowd cheered. They loved that refrain. Only three more stanzas to go. Chihiro was crying by the end. The crowd thought it was an act. That was fine.

A guy jumped up on stage and said, "Chihiro, wow. The acoustic version always gets to me."

"Thanks, Shōto."

"Was that you?" Yui said.

"Not after what you did to me the last time." He started breaking down her drum set. "Word gets out, that's all."

"He's right," Miyako said.

"We have word of mouth," Ayumi said.

Yui shrugged, gave Shōto a quick kiss, and helped him with the drums.

"Yui," Keima said, back from the van.

Everyone looked up.

"Spot on. Keep it up." He tapped at his PFP. "Miyako—"

"I know. I'm listening and not performing."

"I don't care if you listen. I care if you keep tempo. Eri."

"Big brother!"

Keima sighed. "Fewer mistakes than usual."

Eri threw her arms up and yelled, "Yay!"

"Ayumi."

"Yes, Keima?"

"Your guitar sounds out of tune. I think one of the pegs is loose. Leave it with me. I'll work on it."

"I want to fix it myself," Ayumi said.

"I don't mind," Keima said.

"You do everything," Ayumi said. "Besides, I want to be able to fix my own guitar. If I can't figure it out, I want you to show me what to do."

Keima nodded. "Chihiro."

"Yes, Keima?"

Keima took a breath. "I'm worried about 'Forgotten Goddess'. I think you're reusing some chords. The lyrics are great, but it needs a better hook." He watched her carefully.

"Dammit!" Chihiro said. "That's what it is. That's been bugging me for three weeks."

"You could work on it with Miyako." Keima still watched her. "She wants to do some songwriting anyway."

"That's a great idea," Chihiro said.

"When you're not busy," Miyako said with a wink.

"That's it," Keima said. He put away the PFP and started unhooking the electronics.

Yui and Shōto left after everything was loaded.

"Ayumi, Eri," Miyako said. "Let's head over to my place."

"It's late," Ayumi said.

"And, big brother," Eri said.

Miyako rolled her eyes.

"Oh," Ayumi said.

"Oh what?" Eri said.

"We'll tell you later," Ayumi said. She and Miyako grabbed Eri and left.

"Subtle," Keima said.

"I like Shōto," Chihiro said.

"Me too."

"And Mars likes him," Chihiro said.

"That's good," Keima said. "Just Ayumi and Tenri left." He climbed in the van.

"Could we talk?" Chihiro said, getting into the passenger seat. "When we get back to my house?" She pulled the door shut and held it until she heard the click.

"Sure. Good set, by the way." He watched her when he said it.

She smiled at him. "Glad to know you're listening."

He drove onto the road.

"How is Tenri?" he asked.

"Diana is still trying to rebuild her. Ten years is more than half of Tenri's life." She watched Keima. "How good do you think the band is?"

"No idea. I'm just the roadie."

"No you're not," Chihiro said. "You haven't been that for ... what is it?"

"Four months," he said. "That's when the shit jobs ended."

"You're more manager now."

He shook his head. "Engineer, maybe."

"A little of both," she said. "Anyway, we like what you do. And, thanks for the feedback on the song. I needed that."

She watched him again.

"Yui and Miyako want to do a demo tape," she said.

"It's your band. I'm just the roadie-engineer-manager."

She sighed. "Statistically, what are our chances?"

"Lousy," he said. " _I_ love your music, but I'm just the tech guy."

"We've only been doing this a year. Maybe it's too early," Chihiro said.

"That was a lot of effort for a conversation this riveting," he said.

She sighed and watched the road. Fortunately, they weren't far from her house.

Keima backed into the driveway, parked and started to unload. He saw Chihiro's mother in a window and waved. She waved back. Chihiro started to say something, gave up, and helped Keima unload the van.

"What do you want to talk about?" he said when they were done.

"Let's take a walk," Chihiro said.

Keima shrugged. He glanced at her while they walked and waited.

"We love what you do for the band," Chihiro said.

"Okay," he said.

"And..."

"And?"

"You don't need to do it anymore," Chihiro said.

"I don't?"

"No," she said. She looked around. "I mean the groveling is over."

"What are you talking about?"

"You don't need to be the roadie anymore. I'm releasing you from your contract. If you want." She waited for a reaction.

"Chihiro, the groveling was over four months ago. I thought you knew that."

"What?" she said.

"That's when the shit jobs ended," he said.

"What have you been doing for four months?"

"Helping my girlfriend with her band."

She stared at him.

"You heard me," he said.

"Oh," she said.

"Was that it?" he asked.

"No," she said. "I'm thinking of taking '10,000 Tears' out of the set."

"Like hell you are!"

She stared at him again.

"That's your best song," he said. "There's no way that's leaving the set."

"I thought you hated it," she said.

"Are you crazy? That's my favorite song."

"You leave when I play it."

"I walk out of sight when you play it," he said. "But I never miss it."

"Why do you walk out of sight?" she asked.

He looked away. "You might go easy on it. It works, because you give it everything."

She gave him a confused look.

He sighed. "You might go easy on it for me."

Another confused look.

"Because, it gets to me," he said. "And I don't want you to see me like that."

"Like what?" she said. "Oh. That's why—"

"You're not taking it out of the set!" He looked away again. "It's your best song. Everyone knows it."

"It's just—"

"I know what it's about." He closed his eyes. "That's why it's my favorite. It keeps the jerk away." He pulled out his PFP and called up the statistics for the night. He started walking again.

She caught up to him and said, "Do you want to do something this weekend?"

"Whatever you want to do," he said.

"It's not an obligation."

He sighed. "You're asking me on a date. I'm saying yes."

"Okay," she said. "I just—"

"Chihiro! You don't need to force me to go out with you. I'm in love with you. Just ask." He tapped through each song.

She watched him work.

"Is that my picture?" she said.

"Yes."

"My picture is your wallpaper?"

"Yes."

He had a different picture for each screen.

"How many pictures do you have of me?" she asked.

"Two hundred and eight," he said. "On this one."

She stopped walking. "Keima," she said softly. "Why do you still love me?"

He put away the PFP.

"You're still infuriating," he said. "And you still challenge me. And, I love seeing you on stage. I love how happy it makes you. And, you're the most special person I know. And, when you smile at me, you're the most beautiful thing in the world."

She smiled at him for that then narrowed her eyes. "Was that last one from one of your games?"

He thought about it. "That was from ninety-two games. It's still true."

She stood in front of him and started to speak. She stopped, started again and stopped again. She looked away. He tilted his head to see her more easily, and waited.

"Close your eyes," she said.

He shrugged and closed his eyes. She put her hands on his shoulders and leaned toward him. She pulled back. She leaned forward again and tilted her head. She pulled back. She slid her hand under his coat into his pocket and pulled out her guitar pick. He looked down at her.

"Do you always have this?" she asked.

"Yes," he said.

"Do you ever leave it in a shirt accidentally?"

"I don't wear the same shirt two days in a row," he said. "Could I have it back?"

She gave it back. "You had it on you that night I helped you with Ayumi."

He looked at her.

"When we were invisible," she said. "And Vintage found us. You pulled me close. I felt it in your pocket. I could only think of two reasons why you'd still have it."

"I've told you I'm in love with you plenty of times."

"It's nice to have proof."

"Wait," he said. "You told me you knew before Ayumi."

"No," she said. "I implied it."

He scowled at her then sighed. "But it doesn't matter, because you knew before I told you."

He took out his PFP.

"You've gotten a lot more mature in the last six months," Chihiro said.

"Gut wrenching agony does that to you," he said without looking up.

"I know," she said.

He stopped walking. "Sorry."

"You brought it up," she said.

"There's that infuriating side again."

She smiled at him. "It's how you fell in love with me."

"I must be more in love than any guy alive."

They started walking again.

"Keima, did the shit jobs hurt?"

"No," he said, still focused on the PFP. "You were working through your pain. I was okay with that." He stopped. "What hurt the most was the first month."

"I had a few fun ideas," she said.

"Not the jobs," he said. "You flinched when I got too close to you. That's the part I hated." He lowered the PFP and his face softened. "But, it got better. Two months ago, you smiled at me for the first time since that night. You've smiled at me a lot since then."

She gave him a smile for that one.

He lifted the PFP, but she pushed it back down.

"Keima," she said. "I'm still in love with you." She held her breath, waiting for a response.

"I know," he said. He put the PFP in his pocket.

"What?"

"Everyone knows. You didn't keep me around for six months just because I'm good with the band."

She scowled at him. "Everyone knew?"

"You couldn't write a song like that about a guy you didn't like," he said. He stepped closer. "I still liked hearing you say it. I've been waiting six months for that. I wouldn't mind hearing it again."

"Fine," she said. "I'm in love with you. In spite of your personality." She tried not to smile but failed. "What do you want to—?"

He pulled her close and kissed her. She froze in shock, but he continued the kiss until she relaxed. He still kissed her, until he couldn't take it anymore. He pulled back and exhaled slowly.

"I've been waiting six months for that too," he said.

She sighed. "It felt like it."

Chihiro looked around, scanning the skies.

"No one here," he said. "No one will take that away from you."

"That was pretty good," she said. "What made you want to do that?"

"You tried to kiss me a couple of minutes ago and failed."

She gasped.

"It didn't take a gaming genius to figure that out," he said.

She glared at him. She tried to think of something rotten to say, couldn't come up with anything, and kissed him instead. She wrapped her arms around his neck and tried to kiss the hell out of him. He kissed back just as hard. They struggled with each other to see who would stop first. Chihiro finally pulled away and laid her head against his chest, panting. Keima laughed, a desperate, half-insane sound.

"Are you okay?" she said, looking up.

"I finally have permission to be happy."

"Yes," she said and laid her head on his chest again. "You have permission to be happy." She sighed. "That was the first kiss I always wanted. It makes up for a lot. Not everything, but a lot."

"Does this mean I can get rid of the van?"

"No."

"Damn."


End file.
